Nike Benassi JDI Fanny Pack Slides
Nike has reimagined its classic Benassi slide for summer 2018, which means they’re now available in blinding neon shades—and also are a good ways into the deep end. The simple be-Swooshed strap—you know, that piece of rubber that holds your foot secure—has been replaced by a zippered compartment, pouchy and crescent-shaped, with a logo patch on the front. Yes, these are the Nike “Fanny Pack” Benassi Slides ($50 USD) and…they are ungodly, but also maybe brilliant.
It’s not difficult to imagine these fitting in to some kind of Technicolor summer-block-party scene. They’ll transition easily, I’d imagine, into the wardrobe of anyone with a mental picture of the Coachella layout, or anyone who spends a considerable amount of time on The Playa. But there’s something almost delightfully functional about these, too. I can practically hear my mother’s reaction as I slip them on: “It’s always good to have an extra secure pocket to store your credit cards and ID.” As a hardcore devotee of the classic Nike slide for every occasion—as well as of the practice of not losing shit—I’m having a surprisingly easy time understanding their appeal. If the widespread adoption of the cross-body bag, a fanny pack in all ways but name, tells us anything, it’s this: Guys love to have teched-out, slightly obnoxious ways to carry stuff.
In the end, these sandals will feel right at home in the closet of the man who thinks clothing and novelty need not be exclusive concepts—and probably also in that of the adult who uses the word “clout” without irony. Twitter is already popping off with jokes concerning what one might carry around in their new shoe pockets. Which raises another, trickier question: How do you get your stuff out of them? Do you do a slapdash “tree” pose? Do you raise your knee up as close to your face as possible? Do you kick yourself in the head? Do you take them off first? And while we’re asking questions, does the other slide also have a pocket? Tough questions, all—and ones that, thanks to Nike, we’ll be answering all summer.